


Twisted Wonderland One-Shots Two: Eelectric Boogaloo

by HowAreYouGoodPerson



Category: Twisted-Wonderland (Video Game)
Genre: One-Shot, crackfic
Language: English
Status: In-Progress
Published: 2020-04-22
Updated: 2020-09-26
Packaged: 2021-03-01 22:00:48
Rating: General Audiences
Warnings: No Archive Warnings Apply
Chapters: 2
Words: 5,974
Publisher: archiveofourown.org
Story URL: https://archiveofourown.org/works/23784319
Author URL: https://archiveofourown.org/users/HowAreYouGoodPerson/pseuds/HowAreYouGoodPerson
Summary: One-shots made post-release of Twisted Wonderland. Will probably still be somewhat OOC though since I'm taking my time and can't read Japanese well lmao. Anyway, I hope you enjoy! (I update when I update honestly.)
Kudos: 20





	1. Night Raven College- Critter Crossroads

**Author's Note:**

> This is like. The first thing I've written for this game since October to completion, and I still ain't surprised that it is.

[March 19th]

… He was finally alone, right? He had to be, there was no way those creepy twins could’ve followed him this far…

“Surprise~~~”

“GAH!!!”

Even now the strength of the sleazy one surprised him, yet it quickly melted into pain from his head smacking onto the cold, hard stone below, the impact causing the contents to spill from his bag…

“Man, I ain’t see a runner like you in a while! I ain’t sure if you’re brave or just plain stupid, thinking we weren’t gonna find you and all that…” That sadistic bastard… he couldn’t, he wouldn’t! If he could just get to the town, and hop on a train, whatever train who cares where, anywhere’s better than h-

“Going somewhere so soon? Rather rude, don’t you think?” Before he could even utter a word, it all went black…

“Ugh, we could’ve finished about five contracts by now, what a waste… Oh well, nothing to be done! Let’s get this idiot to Azul, and fast. The Professors should be going on patrol for curfew soon… Ugh, clumsy fool dropped his stuff… I’ll catch up and make sure nothing’s left behind!”

“You got it Jade! Hm hm~ We should get some milkshakes after this~”

And away the twin strolled, leaving Jade all alone in the courtyard…

Ugh, what a slob he was. Old candy wrappers, crumpled homework… Even his textbook looked as if it were tossed into a vortex. The only thing that wasn’t in disarray was some game system…

“Not a surprise, considering his record…” 

“... Hm? Is that a naughty little puppy I hear out and about?”

“...!” 

Damnit! Of course this just had to happen! If Professor Crewel even saw enough to know his House, Azul would be furious! He had to hide… Damnit, where could he even hide?!

… Well… Desperate times called for desperate measures…

\-----------

“Now, now, you know it’s against the rules to be out so late! I suggest you come out and beg for forgiveness. I might even be nice and let you off with a warning…” Unsurprisingly, no response. A shame, he was hoping to end patrol early… Oh well.

A glance behind the bushes, nothing there. A peek behind the trees, still completely bare… This little puppy seemed quite fond of hide and seek it seems… He could only imagine one last place they could be…

“... Aha! … Ah…”

The trash can was as empty as could be.

“... Hmph. They must’ve cowered off already. Trien’s problem now… Wait, what’s…” Stark-red gloves contrasted against the bright yellow device, examining it with an almost bored gaze.

“Oh, it’s one of those gaming consoles I’ve heard about, a ‘Flip,’ wasn’t it? … Well, I doubt they’re going to come claim it considering when it was found, so I think I’ll just hold onto it and make them suffer!” And with a downright evil chuckle, Crewel was off, leaving the Courtyard in complete silence…

\-----------

“... F… Finally! Ugh, my entire body’s in agony…” A single, gloved hand emerged from the well, awkwardly palming the edge until it found as secure of a grip it’d get, before Jade heaved over the stone wall, crashing to the ground.

… This was bad. Professor Crewel was right, there was no way Jade could just stroll up and ask for it…

… But… It seems he wasn’t going to dig deep into matters either… Letting him get away with one, insignificant piece of evidence would be fine, right? 

Hmph, of course it would be. What’s the worst that could happen?

\-----------

[March 21st]

“... Hmph, I forgot about that thing…” The obnoxiously bright yellow clashed horrendously with the remainder of the drawer's contents, almost as if beckoning to him…

“... Oh, what the hell! I have nothing better to do anyway! Now, where’s the switch for th-ah, there it is!”

Within moments, the screen came to life, the stark-white screen almost blinding him before his poor eyes adjusted. Said eyes flicked through the various games, none of them seeming interesting in the slightest, until a notification popped up, catching his eye.

“... Critter Crossroads just finished downloading, huh? Guess we’ll give that one a try…”

He’d expected grand fanfare, a show that would practically force itself into your face, so it was quite the surprise when he was greeted with a soft, quiet tune, in an… Airport? With two small raccoons, of all things. (Well, this was named Critter Crossroads, so it was fitting, he supposed…)

“Hello! You must be the last traveler who signed up for the Hook Getaway Package! I’m Timothy!”

“And I’m Thomas!”

“... Alright, I’ll give them credit, they’re pretty cute for racoons…”

They asked various questions, and at one point, he even made a little character for himself, (as best he could, with such limited options…) and soon enough, a short scene played as they flew through the sky to said island… In all honesty, he wasn’t quite sure what the appeal of this game was suppose to b-

“... Is that a puppy???” It had to be. It had to be, there was no mistaking that silhouette, as cartoony as it was. It was such a pitiful looking thing, with bandages all over, only faint gleams where it’s eyes were behind them… The second animal left the airport, and he couldn’t stop a gasp.

“ANOTHER PUPPY???”

Oh. This puppy. Was ICONIC. Red and black spotted fur with white-accented clothing… Oh, this was a design targeted towards his very heart!

… He was starting to see the appeal to this game…

\-----------

[April 3rd]

That damn bell… Has it always been so slow?! Normally the mere presence of potions and chemicals was soothing to him, but now it was driving him downright insane…

*Bing bong bang bong~

“Class is over puppies! You’re dismissed! Now shoo, shoo!”

Grumbles and groans came from the group as their professor forced them out the door with a harsh glare, soon leaving the once lively room completely dead… Finally, the day was over…

He only had one hour left to catch the guppy Berry had asked for...

With far too much suaveness for a man who’d only owned a Flip for a few days, he spun it from his pockets, kicking his feet upon the desk with a satisfied sigh…

Only to hear the door open.

“Ugh, if you forgot something, grab it and get out! Master’s busy right now!” Divus didn’t even bother to look up, until he heard that signature huff of none other than…

“... Ugh, I should’ve known it was you, Trien… What do you want?!” Finally he glanced at the door, only to find Dire and Vargas standing alongside him. Though normally he’d be pleasantly surprised to find the other’s company (but don’t misunderstand! He was as bitter as always seeing Vargas at his doorstep,) this was easily an exception. Even so, this was his boss...

“... Alright, alright, what do you need? Make it quick.” The group exchanged a glance, before pulling up some chairs before his desk. It was silent a few moments, the three watching as Divus impatiently glanced back to the lit screen, before Trien coughed.

“Headmaster, since Crewel is clearly too busy for us, shouldn’t you make this quick?”

“Oh, yes, yes, you’re absolutely correct Trien…” This time, Dire cleared his throat, before looking upon his subordinate.

“Forgive me for being blunt, but I believe this is the best way to approach this… You seem to be far too wrapped up in that game of yours. Now, enjoying recreational activities is fine and all, but it seems as if it’s beginning to seep into every part of your daily routine…” Before he could continue, Trien cut in, his words laced with their usual point as always.

“I recall just this afternoon how he took my lunch from the staff fridge, all because he was paying more attention to that screen than any of his surroundings… And Vargas, didn’t he turn in his share of the paperwork in late just last week?” Said coach shivered at the mere thought.

“Mmhm… I didn’t even know the guy was capable of being late to anything… Thought one of the ghosts at Ramshackle’d gotten him for a moment!” Divus rolled his eyes at such petty reasoning, and was MORE than willing to debate them…

Suddenly, a light “whoosh” filtered through the room, Divus lunging for the screen.

“Damnit! I don’t think I can get that balloon in time no nO NO!!!”

The three professors exchanged uncomfortable looks, listening to the loud crunching of grass coming from the console, before hearing a “pop.”

“HA HA! Now come on, give one of those seasonal crafting recipes… C’mon…”

“CREWEL!” An angry meow followed.

“WHAT?!” 

Vargas winced, scooting his chair a bit farther from Trien (who handed him Lucious with a deadly glare), while all Dire could do was sigh, rubbing his eyes (mask?)

“Crewel, this game of your has become a problem! We shouldn’t have to barge into our coworker’s classroom because he’s too busy talking to fictional animals to be doing his job properly!”

“EXCUSE YOU TRIEN! I’VE BEEN DOING MY JOB PERFECTLY WELL! … Hmph. See, this is exactly why I’d rather talk to Berry and Luckster than YOU!” Vargas leaned towards Dire, quietly whispering “who’s Berry and Luckster?” before receiving glares from both men.

“NOT NOW VARGAS!”

“THEY’RE MY NEIGHBORS, AND I WOULD DIE FOR THEM!”

“Good GOD Crewel, pull yourself together! They’re NOT. REAL. It’s all scripted! You know this! If anything, you know it better that I do!”

Divus took a deep breath, and for a moment, they thought he was about to lose it.

“... You’re right, you’re right… I have let this get out of hand, haven’t I…”

… They were all legitimately surprised. They didn’t think this would end so quickly, much less smoothly. Well, this was easily cause for celebration! Dire couldn’t resist giving Divus a good ol’ pat on the shoulder, before rising to put his chair away.

“You have, but we all lose track of things once in a while! What’s important is that you realize it! Now, how about we all go down to The Mostro Lounge and get something to eat? It’s been an exhausting day for us all, yes?”

“... Hmph, while normally I’d be reluctant to accept such an offer, Lucious does enjoy their fish…”

“I’m in! I could use a good steak right about now!”

“... Alright, alright… But not for long! I have work to catch up on, after all. You three wait outside while I lock up!”

And thus they did!

Only to realize their mistake as the door locked behind them. (In hindsight, they were fools to think this would be so easy…)

All Dire could do was sigh once more.

“... Oh dear… I was hoping it wouldn’t come to this, yet it seems drastic measures must be taken… You two, I request that you meet me in the Staff Lounge in… About ten minutes or so.”

\-----------

“... Crowley, don’t tell me that’s what I think it is…”

“It is, Trien. Now, choose a color.” It looked as if Trien was in agony as he grabbed the coral Flip.

“Very good. Your turn Vargas.”

“Yeah, uh… I’ll take grey but… Dire, I gotta ask. How on earth is us getting into this game going to get Divus outta it?!” Crowley grabbed the last Flip, a stunning turquoise, before fumbling with it through metal claws.

“Oh, don’t worry you two, I have a plan! Now, in each of your Flips is a copy of ‘Critter Crossroads’. I have reviewed it online, and found we will need to do the base tutorial before we can visit Crewel’s island. Now let’s begin!”

The two professors exchanged pained glances, yet proceeded…

\-----------

… It was time.

Dire took a deep breath, before knocking on the lab room door.

“... What?”

“Crewel, I would like to apologize for our earlier behavior. We have each tried ‘Critter Crossroads’, and are quite enchanted with it! It’s not much, but we’ve each brought gifts as a sign of goodwill!”

It was silent for a few moments, before the click of a lock filled the air. Cold, steel eyes leered through, only relaxing at the sight of the Flips within their grips.

“... Alright. I apologize for my earlier outburst as well, it was… Unprofessional, to say the least… Now come in.

One by one they entered the lab, pulling up a chair before the desk, where Divus’ Flip lay. Just from a mere glance, it was clear to see how much work was put into his island… Divus himself seemed extremely suspicious, before finally taking a seat in his chair.

“Alright, I’m opening my island. Don’t try anything funny!” They all swore not to.

One by one they arrived at his island. Trien was first, his character looking like himself… (Fifty years ago.)

Next was Vargas, who didn’t look like him at all due to limitations (much to his disappointment.) 

And finally was Crowley.

“... How do you have a mask? Didn’t you start this game today?!”

“... Did none of you get a mask from the start?”

None of them decided to question it further.

For the first time in weeks, Divus finally seemed relaxed, leaning back into his chair with a smile before greeting them at the airport gates.

“Well! Welcome to my island! Feel free to wander about and all, just don’t take anything without asking!”

“Wonderful! As thanks for having us, I shall give you some flowers, and make us some tea!”

For Trien and Vargas, it felt as if horrid, agonizing hours passed, by… Yet Crewel and Crowley seemed perfectly thrilled, chatting about Divus' seven dog neighbors and infrastructure…

And then it happened.

It looked as if Crewel were about to scream when Dire mistakenly knocked over his teacup, staining his precious coat.

(It seemed despite everything, his fashion still came first and foremost.) 

“Oh goodness, my apologies Crewel! I should have focused more on my surroundings than on my conversation with Benny!” Crewel’s Flip was practically tossed to the side as if it were mere garbage..

“It’s… It’s fine! It’s fine! … I should be able to wash it out with water! Yes, water...”

And with that, he was gone, a downright evil smile spreading upon Crowley’s face.

“Perfect. Now, are you all ready to proceed with the plan?”

Both men nodded.

“Wonderful…”

He picked back up his Flip.

“Do you both remember the axes and shovels I gave you?”

They suddenly had a very bad feeling about this…

“... Yeah? Why did you give ‘em to us Dire?”

“Oh? Well, that’s simple!” Dire’s little character whipped out an axe. How could such a thing feel so malicious…

“Do you two know about cockatoos and old cages? Well, I’ll explain anyway! They get very attached to their cages, which becomes a problem once it becomes unsuitable, or in severe cases, unhealthy for them… So, the only way to have them accept any change, is to prove once and for all that they’ll never be able to use them again…”

And thus the first tree went down.

“By completely destroying it, and forcing them to accept cold, harsh reality…”

\-----------

[April 4th]

There were many different students within the class, all which had wildly conflicting views and opinions… However, for once in their lives, they could all agree on one thing…

This was the most uncomfortable hour of their entire lives…

Surprisingly, it was hard to focus on a cauldron without Professor Crewel’s harsh glare burning into the back of their skulls. Yeah, it was nerve wracking, but compared to… This…

“... I smell a potion burning… Stir more…”

The poor guy couldn’t even find the strength to look up from his desk… Even the signature “whoosh” of Headmaster Crowley flying in wasn’t enough to phase him.

“Good afternoon students! I assume you’ve all been working diligently in your studies?”

“Y-yes Headmaster!”

“Wonderful! I see Professor Crewel’s on the track back to his normal, chipper self!” (They didn’t think he could look more pathetic… Yet he somehow did.)

“...”

“Fantastic! … Though, I suppose I should take over class for the remainder of the session, seeing as how he’s temporarily lost the will to live! Now, what are we working on?”

… Perhaps they should behave until he got it back together...


	2. House Leaders- Within Our Own

**Summary for the Chapter:**

> A team-building exercise ends just how you'd expect. Badly.

**Notes for the Chapter:**

> Hey I finally wrote another non-staff fic and it's another joke video game fic LMAOO!!! (... I actually have a Malleus fic that's been in my drafts for months now that I should probably eventually finish......)
> 
> Formatting's a bit iffy at some parts because it messed up when I transferred over but it's fine lmaoo, still readable! 
> 
> Anyway, thank you for reading, and I hope you have a nice day/night!

“I am ashamed! ABSOLUTELY ASHAMED of all seven of you!” The six boys around the table sighed, knowing a lecture was about to come up… Save Rosehearts, who stood straight, with his lip pulled just the same.

“You’re absolutely justified, Headmaster. To think everyone at the table here has the audacity to call themselves House Leaders… Whatever punishment you feel befitting for them, I shall assist you in carrying out.”

“Rosehearts, you’re no exception! I’m equally ashamed of all of you right now!”

“... W-WHAT?! … I-I mean… Why is that, Headmaster?”

With a tiny click, a projector whirled to life, a chart with all the School Houses and various finances portrayed within.

“During our recent school fundraiser, we had a very specific goal… To make enough funds to remodel our beloved Magilift Stadium.” Immediately, a hand rose in the air, Vil huffing.

“I still think it’s a waste of money. It was only remodeled two years ago! We should be using that money for Pomefiore!”

“Pomefiore?! What about Scarabia!”

“As if you two deserve it! It’s clear as day that Octavinelle made the most, so logically the money should go to us~”

“... I… Ignihyde could always u-”

“ENOUGH!!! … Now, as I was saying… After going over the costs and profits with one of the professors… I’ve made a startling discovery…” Metal claws slammed onto the old oak table below, glowing eyes glaring across the table.

“WE’RE 500 MADOL UNDER THE GOAL!!!”

… No one said a word. They just gave the Headmaster an incredulous look.

“Don’t look at me like that!!! … Anyway, how are we supposed to remodel anything without the proper funds?! I trusted all se-... Oh my, I’m so stressed, I forgot there were only six of you! How could you six have failed me… And the school?!” Leona rolled his eyes, flicking a piece of paper at Vil in boredom.

“It’s just 500 Madol, take it from your own pocket.”

“I. FIVE HUNDRED MADOL?! FROM MY OWN POCKET?!?! HOW COULD YOU BE SO CRUEL, KINGSCHOLAR?!?!?! I spend so much of my vastly limited time taking care of all you students, and I ask for ONE TINY FAVOR, and THIS is the thanks I get! Unbelievable!!!” He flopped into a nearby swivel chair, sobbing alligator tears as the students just watched, hoping he’d stop in time for them to go to lunch.

“... Now back to business!” … They were going to miss lunch, weren’t they. “Since apparently you’re all worthless at selling ice cream, I pondered and pondered… Just what could be the reason for this? And that’s when it hit me! Instead of working together to achieve one goal, you’ve all been sabotaging each other (and more importantly the sales,) to reach the wrong one! So, I’ve called you all here today for a team-building exercise!”

At the mere mention of teamwork, the entire table groaned. Crowley ignored them.

“ Now, since so many of you are addicted to your phone screens and such, I’ve even been so kind as to choose an activity that’ll use them! Every single one of you will go into the App Market, and download a game called “Within Our Own!” Sputtering immediately came from the lone tablet in the room. For a moment, everyone thought it’d malfunctioned, until Idia’s voice screamed through (quietly.)

“ WITHIN OUR OWN?! HOW IS THAT SUPPOSED TO HELP US WITH TEAMWORK?! … I feel like if this group played it it would end with someone’s head on a stick if not something worse an-”

“It seems Shroud’s quite familiar with the game already! Well, for those of you who are unaware, the objective of this game is to work together to find the player who is The Faker of the group! The one who’s The Faker, on the other hand, will attempt to eliminate the rest of you! (Though it’s a bit violent, it’s free, so I’ll give it a pass~” Another hand went up in the air.

“Yes, Al-Asim.”

“Yeah I agree with Idia. Someone’s actually gonna die if we play this. Have you SEEN how some of these people get?! Plus, they’re selling some of the leftover fundraiser ice creams at the cafeteria today! If I don’t go now, they’ll sell out of Cherria Limefellows!!!”

“Too bad. Now download the game, all of you!!!” Three phones were taken out, and clicking was heard over the tablet’s speaker. Vil and Leona didn’t move.

“I’m not wasting my time playing some stupid game, I have better things to do!”

“ Hate agreeing with Vil, of all people, but I’m leaving too.” Before they could leave their seats, the door locked from outside.

“... Wha…”

“... You’ve got to be kidding me.”

“Haha! No jests here, you two! Now, let me rephrase this… You WILL play this game with the others, or there will be severe consequences. Now, if for some reason threats are not enough to convince you… The winners of the game will get to decide what we’ll use the fundraiser money on!” The two immediately took out their phones, and the room became tense.

“Say goodbye to that money, Kingscholar.”

“Hmph, I’d be saying hello to the new stadium, Schoenheit.”

Little did Crowley know how much he’d regret those words…

\-----------

“Alright! Has everyone figured out how to play yet?”

“No, it just finished downloading for m-” Kalim was cut off.

“Wonderful! Now, since Shroud already knows how this game works, he can host it! Time’s ticking Shroud~” Frantic clicking was heard over the speaker, before everyone’s phones went off.

“I-I sent the code through the House Leader group chat… Please hurry up……”

The first person to join the match was Idia (who simply remained as “Idia”), shortly followed by Riddle (who was “Best Monarch.”)

Next were Azul (as “Vil,” much to Vil’s annoyance,) Leona (who didn’t bother to change his name from “New Player,) and Vil, (who’d named himself “Prettiest” since that was the only name he wanted that could fit.)

Afterwards was…

“... H-huh…? Who’re Tsunotaro…?” Everyone looked at each other and shrugged, before looking at Crowley, who also shrugged.

“I don’t see the harm in letting them join. It’s not like they’ll win! If they do, then sure, they can decide what to do with the money too!”

No one paid it a second thought. Finally, Kalim managed to join, struggling to figure out the controls. (He was New Player1.)

“... Everyone’s here…” The door suddenly unlocked, and Crowley went out the door, Professor Crewel walking inside.

“Wonderful! Now I have a lovely soup calling my name, so behave for Professor Crewel, alright? Now awayyyyyy~” … And then he was gone, the door locking once more as the Alchemy Professor smiled.

“ Make sure to entertain me, puppies~”

\-----------

The atmosphere was almost uncomfortable now, with the Madol on the line, and Crewel in the corner. Not saying a single word, but watching for anyone who dared to cheat or throw the game…

“... I-I’m starting… Remember not to say what you are…” They all exchanged glances, before scooting their chairs at least five feet apart, untrusting of the others to not peek. Soon enough, the game started, and lives would soon be taken…

\-----------

Riddle’s eyes darted about the screen, watching the tiny vegetable-shaped people slowly run out into the castle corridor… Hmph. Such a win was surely guaranteed for him! He simply had to do his tasks, slowly weed the other crewmates out during the Accusation Phase, and t-

“SHHHK!!!” 

… His phone crashed to the ground as the culprit ran off, disappearing into a nearby hole. Kalim looked over, seeing Riddle staring into space with a blank expression.

“Riddle…? You good?” Slowly his hands started to twitch, and Kalim moved slightly further away.

“... AHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHH!!!!!! WHO DID IT?! WHICH ONE OF YOU PATHETIC WHELPS WA-MMPFH!!! MMPH PMM!!!”

“BAD PUPPY! TIME OUT FOR YOU!!!”

“MPPPPPGHH!!!!!!” Riddle was tossed into the side room. It must’ve been enchanted to be soundproof, but they could still hear him screaming from within. A siren blare came from their phones, and they all found themselves in a meeting, called by “Vil…”

“Well, well! It seems our little Faker isn’t wasting much time! They’re already taken out our poor, unfortunate Riddle… Now, I f-”

“It’s Azul.”

“Wait, wha-”

“It has to be Azul! He’s being super suspicious!”

“... Naming himself after Vil is kinda sus… He might’ve done it to throw us off…”

“Hey, now listen here y-”

“VOTE HIM OFF! Using my name for such underhanded tactics! How tasteless!”

“LISTEN TO ME YOU IDIOTS! I ONLY MADE MY NAME VIL SO I COULD DO THAT IF I WAS THE FAKER!!! I’M TRYING TO TELL YOU I-” A message popped up in the in-game chat from Tsunotaro.

‘I saw Vil walk away from the room Best Monarch died in. Quite suspicious, I must say...’ Everyone glared at Azul, who looked ready to explode.

“IT’S YOU!!!”

“LISTEN TO ME IT WA- STOP VOTING!!!”

And thus “Vil” was tossed out into the castle’s moat, and Azul was tossed into the side room, saying many rude things a student of Night Raven College should not say. They all watched his character drown, realizing their mistake.

‘Vil was not The Faker.”

\-----------

… Every single time…

Vil looked back at the entrance of the throne room, seeing that damn, purple-clad person standing there… Every single room he went into, they were there… Watching… Waiting…

How in Wonderland was he supposed to do anything when they constantly lurked behind?!

‘... Okay… Calm down down Vil, it’s fine… Perhaps he’s just… Afraid. Yes, afraid! He might think YOU’RE The Faker… All you have to do is walk away, and eventually he’ll leave you alone…’

Vil glanced one last time at the purple character, before darting into the other direction, gasping when they started following behind.

‘He’s still following me.’ He ran into a different room, and purple chased after him. ‘He’s still following me!!! Oh god, is he going to kill me?! I can’t lose, I can’t l- I’LL CALL A MEETING!!!’ The Emergency Horn was only a little farther…

*BRRRRNG!!!*

“WHO’S PURPLE?!” Everyone pointed to Leona, who snickered. “FOR THE ENTIRE MATCH, I HAVEN’T BEEN ABLE TO DO ANYTHING BUT TREMBLE IN FEAR, BECAUSE SOMEONE KEPT CHASING ME!!! IT’S KINGSCHOLAR, IT HAS TO BE!!!” Leona only laughed harder, kicking his feet on the table. (Crewel quickly swatted them off.)

“I’m innocent! I haven’t killed a single person Vil~ You on the other hand… You seem pretty fast to incriminate, don’t you? Especially since you basically admitted you’re not doing your tasks…” Various murmurs filled the table, the group shifting between Vil and Leona… Until another message popped up from Tsunotaro.

‘If no one has died, it may be wise to skip, lest The Faker decides to take advantage of this chaos.’ Oh… Oh, Vil only had ONE friend at this table, and it was sweet little Tsunotaro…

“YES!!! … Yes, let’s not be hasty and skip the vote. Listen to Tsunotaro everyone!” 

Much to his relief, they all agreed… Except Leona, who voted for Vil with a smile.

… Much as he was loath to admit it, he was sure it couldn’t be Leona, thinking about it now. He wouldn’t be wasting this much time making a clown of himself if he was The Faker…

Either way, there was no time to dwell on it now. For the first time since the game started, he was finally alone… He needed to raise the drawbridge, so he should take advantage of the time he had…

Suddenly, his blood ran cold, seeing someone crawl out of a nearby hole.

“No… NO! NO NO NO STAY AWAY FROM ME!!! AHHHHHHHHHH-”

“SHHHK!!!” His character dropped to the ground, and they ran back into the hole.

“You… YOU MISERABLE LITTLE SWINE!!! WHEN I GET MY HANDS ON YOU I’LL KILL YO-MMPFPH!!! MMPH MMMM GHHM!!!”

And thus Vil was tossed into the room, Riddle and Azul shouting as he crashed onto them.

*BRRRRNG!!!*

“VIL WAS RIGHT!!! IT HAD TO BE LEONA!!! THEY WERE TOGETHER THE WHOLE TIME!!!” Everyone was glaring at him, and it was now Leona realized he may have messed up.

“I didn’t kill him!!! I was just playing around!!!”

“W-WE CAN’T BELIEVE THAT!!! … Vil himself said you were acting sus…”

“You two seriously can’t be that stupid, right?! You really think I’d kill Vil after he accused me like that?! If I was The Faker, I’d be damning myself to failure!!!” A message popped up from Tsunotaro.

‘I was with Prettiest and New Player. I had left them for a few moments, but returned’

‘upon having an awful feeling. When I’d arrived, New Player was nowhere to be’

‘found, and I discovered Prettiest’s body on the ground. I did not see’

‘anyone else around.’

Kalim glared at Leona, and an angry emoji flashed on the tablet.

“HE’S LYING!!! VIL AND I WERE ALONE THE WHOLE TIME!!! ARE YOU REALLY GOING TO LISTEN TO HIM OVER ME?! YOU DON’T EVEN KNOW WHO HE IS!”

The beeps indicating a vote went off, and Leona’s character was tossed into the moat. He growled at Professor Crewel, storming into the side room himself.

‘New Player was not The Faker.”

“... Oh no…”

“Idia I’m scared.”

‘... I loathe to admit it, but The Faker is quite skilled…’

\-----------

*BRRRRNG!!!*

“I DON’T WANNA DIE!!!” 

‘Tsunotaro: ... Why was a meeting called? Did we not just finish one?’

The clacking of a keyboard was heard over the tablet, before a message popped up from Idia.

‘Idia: New Player1 is scared and called a meeting.’

“HOW ARE YOU GUYS SENDING MESSAGES IN GAME?!”

“... Tap the speech bubble at the top right…”

‘New Player1: HI TSUNOTARO I LEARNED HOW TO SEND MESSAGES IN GAME’

‘ANYWAY I DON’T WANNA DIE SO HOW ABOUT WE BUDDY UP 

‘I’M NOT THE FAKER SO I WON’T KILL YOU DON’T WORRY’

‘Tsunotaro: While I appreciate the gesture, tragically, words enough are not’

‘enough for me to trust you.’

‘New Player1: AW COME ON PLEASEEEEEEE’

‘Idia: you guys… there’s only three of us left. the faker only needs one kill to win.’

‘New Player1: WHAT’

‘NO’

‘WHAT DO YOU MEAN’

‘THERE’S STILL THREE OF US’

‘Tsunotaro: Have you not played this game before, New Player1?’

‘New Player1: NO’

A tied sigh escaped the tablet.

‘Tsunotaro: If there are three players left, and only one Faker, then if The Faker isn’t’

‘voted out soon, they will only need one more kill to win. Which means if’

‘we desire to win, we will have to take a risk and vote someone out now, or we will’

‘have to try and complete our tasks before they can kill another. How many tasks’

‘do you both have? I have already completed mine.’

‘Idia: mine are done too.’

‘New Player1: what are tasks”

‘Idia: …’

‘Tsunotaro: Did they not even tell you how to play, New Player1?’

‘New Player1: HEADMASTER CROWLEY DIDNT GIVE ME TIME TO LEARN TH’

‘E CONTROLS ARE THE TASKS THE LIST AT THE UPPER LEFT’

‘WHERES THE INFIRMARY’

“Tsunotaro: Those are the tasks. As for the infirmary, I can guide you there. You’

‘Should have stated you didn’t know the controls sooner, so I could have assisted you.’

‘New Player1: THANKS TSUNO’

‘I OWE YOU ONE’

‘YOU WANT A CHERRIA LIMEFELLOW’

‘I HAVE ENOUGH TO GET TWO’

‘Idia: the meetings about to end kalim.’

‘WAIT ACTUALLY LAST TIME I BOUGHT TWO I WAS AT THE NURSE’S OFFICE’

And thus the meeting ended…

*BRRRRNG!!!*

‘New Player1: FOR A WEEK SO IM PRETTY SURE THEY WON’T LET ME BUY TWO AGAIN’

‘EVEN IF I SAY IT’S FOR A FRIEND’

‘SO DO YOU WANT SOMETHING ELSE’

‘Tsunotaro: Thank you for the offer, New Player1. I would quite enjoy a Choco-Mint Malice myself.’

‘New Player1: ARE THOSE GOOD’

‘I HAVENT TRIED ONE YET’

‘BUT IT LOOKS GOOD’

‘Tsunotaro: It is quite delicious. I hear it has become a staple of Diasomnia.’

‘New Player1: NICE NICE’

‘ILL GET YOU THAT THEN’

‘Idia: you guys we’re supposed to be finding the faker.’

‘New Player1: WHERE DO YOU WANNA MEET AFTER THIS’

‘WHAT ABOUT THE CAFETERIA’

‘Tsunotaro: That is acceptable with me, though I cannot guarantee I shall be alone.’

‘Idia: STOP TALKING ABOUT ICE CREAM WE’RE SUPPOSED TO BE PLAYING THE GAME’

‘New Player1: ALRIGHT I’LL SEE YOU THEN TSUNO’

‘OKAY OKAY’

‘FINE’

‘ACTUALLY’

‘SINCE YOURE BEING RUDE’

‘IM GONNA VOTE FOR YOU IDIA’

‘Idia: WHAT’

‘NO’

‘DON’T’

‘IT’S NOT ME’

‘New Player1: maybe its not but tsunos not yelling at me so :/’

‘besides i dont really need the money’

‘so i have nothing to lose’

‘Idia: WHAT ABOUT IGNIHYDE?! WE COULD USE THE MONEY!!!’

‘New Player1: not my house so… : D’

‘Hey tsuno you wanna vote for idia with me’

‘Tsunotaro: Glady. I will meet you at the Cafeteria soon.”

‘Idia: STOP STOP STOP STOP STOP’

‘STOP STOP ST’

A scream was heard over the tablet, before the call disconnected.

Idia was not The Faker… Which meant that the winner was…

‘New Player1: HEYYYY YOU WERE THE FAKER THIS WHOLE TIME

‘WHY DIDN’T YOU KILL ME’

‘Tsunotaro: I watched you constantly running into walls, and felt pity for you.”

‘New Player1: COOL I’LL TAKE THAT SEE YOU SOON TSUNO’

‘Tsunotaro: I will be seeing you as well.’ Before either of them logged off, Crewel coughed.

“Puppy, don’t forget to ask what he wants to do with the money. House Leader or not, he did win the game…”

“Oh yeah!!! Hold on Prof. Crewel!”

‘New Player1: WAIT’

‘I FORGOT TO ASK SOMETHING

‘THE WINNER WAS SUPPOSED TO CHOOSE WHAT TO DO WITH THE ICE CREAM’

‘FUNDRAISER MONEY SO WHAT DO YOU WANNA USE IT FOR’

‘PLEASE RESPOND PROF CREWELS ASKING’

‘Tsunotaro: Hm…’

‘I have no such use for the money… So I request it to be used for Ramshackle Dorm.’

‘New Player1: REALLY’

‘ALRIGHT’

‘NOW BYE’

‘Tsunotaro: Farewell.’

With that, they hung up. Crewel texted the Headmaster the news, and they could hear a crow-like scream from the distance. A few moments later, he flew through the window.

“WHY WOULD THEY WANT TO WASTE THE MONEY ON RAMSHACKLE?! WHAT ABOUT THE CAFETERIA?! THE STADIUM?! MY OFFICE?!?!” Kalim ran off laughing, while Crewel smirked.

“Too bad Crowley~ You dug this hole, now bury the bone in it.”

\-----------

Thunder popped and crackled from outside, accompanied only by the screeching of corvids…

And then, as the computer was turned off, a deep, sinister chuckled accompanied it, soon turning into a treacherous cackle that roared through the dim-lighted walls of Diasomnia themselves…

“Oh! Did someone win his game? Congratulations, Malleus~” Lilia hopped onto his bed, watching as Malleus left the desk, making sure everything was left as it was.

“Indeed. They made the foolish mistake of not inviting me, so I joined anyway. I was just fortunate enough to be The Faker, so I could make this win my own… Thank you once more for letting me borrow your computer, Vanrouge.”

“Oh, it’s no problem at all~ Now, make sure you freshen up for dinner! I found a brand new casserole recipe to experiment with!” The room was silent, yet Lilia noticed him take a step back.

“... A-actually, Vanrouge… I have made plans… So I will have to forgo dinner for tonight…” Lilia hopped off the bed, taking a step forward.

“Nonsense~ You can simply invite your friend over, hm? Oh, it’s that one human at Ramshackle, isn’t it?” Another step back, another forward…

“... I will see you tomorrow Vanrouge.”

“Malleus Draconia, I forbid you from taking another step back in this room.”

“... Alright.”

So he lunged for the window, climbing out and teleporting before he fell towards the thorns below.

‘DRACONIA!!!!!!”

He was safe… For now.


End file.
